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  • eduartedea

The day I died

Updated: Sep 20, 2022

I laid there, inert, I am confused. I think I know what happened, but I am in shock. Why did I do that? What distracted me or blinded me enough for me not to see the lamp post? Why am I seeing myself laying there? Oh no! I just died! I am dead.

I’ve heard of people who’ve had near death experiences and talked about the moment of inexplicable peace and happiness during their brief passing. Well, this is me now. Can’t tell if I am overwhelmingly happy or rejoiced or peaceful. What I can tell you for sure is that I am out of my body, seeing the crowd and the paramedics come to my rescue.

What a dumb stupid car accident! What was I thinking? I was rushing and didn’t see the lamp post and ended up smashing into, getting crushed underneath it. But I feel ok now. No pain… nothing in fact.

I remember waking up this morning and feeling great. It was a day full of sunshine with deep blue skies and nice weather. Nature seemed happy that day. It was one of those fall mornings where you can still see greenery and hear birds go about their day picking up worms to feed their babies.

“Oh what a beautiful day it is!”, I could hear myself saying. Is it fair that I died on such a beautiful day, or should I say, what a beautiful day to choose to die. Nonsense!

I decided to join the crowd to see for myself; the difficult task of removing the heavy post and lifting the smashed frame of the car to reach for my body seemed exhausting. I moved to the sidewalk to be part of the spectators who kept trying to get a glimpse of the unimaginable scene

to understand what was going on. I couldn’t help but feel disgusted by someone who took a few photos of the wreck! Why do I care?

The paramedics are working hard and it’s been a while, perhaps 30 minutes. I feel sorry for these brave men that do anything possible to save lives. I wish I could tell them that it is ok, that I am gone. It is morning rush hour, I am pretty sure these guys couldn’t even finish their morning coffee before they got summoned to the accident site. They go above and beyond when it comes to their duty.

The task goes on, more people stopped, some passed by without looking. I don’t know why that bothered me.

I am standing on the sidewalk. I suddenly start thinking of all of my friends. I think of him too. I am happy I got to see him the day before. We spent the day together loving each other as if it was our last time on this planet. It turned out to be true for me. What will he say when he get the news? Will he cry? Will he miss me?

And my friends…what will they do? Who will claim my body? I am a foreigner in this country, I only have my friends, they will have the tedious job of sending my body home to my family. But then again, who will get on such a task especially on a Monday morning. Couldn’t I have done this on a holiday or weekend? Nope, it had to be at the beginning of the week. What can I say, the damage is done.

What an awkward situation to be “here” seeing the accident scene, the people around, the paramedics, I can’t even hear a thing. I wish I could hear people commenting or speculating the reasons of my crash. I can see everything, no one can see me, I only wish I could hear…

I see the ambulance approaching, I see my body finally freed from the tangled wreck. They cover me and place me inside the ambulance. I come closer to see myself, to tell myself good bye. Little by little the crowd disperses and everyone gets on with their day. The traffic is slowly going back to normal. I see a car stopped close to the ambulance, I feel it is one of my dear friends. I recognize him, he is so sad and holds his head in a sign of disbelief. I am standing almost right next to him, he is saying something but I can’t hear. I want to comfort him and tell him I am ok. I reach to hold his hand but suddenly I see, within the deep blue sky, an intense, warming soothing light appearing out of nowhere. This is the moment… I must go.



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